


My Everything

by nahm



Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Athos’ Flight or Fight is Way Off, Can be AU, Comfort, Episode Tag, Falling Apart, M/M, Marsac Can Be Seen As a Past BF, Milady Like To Fuck With Athos, Polyamorous Character, Polyamours, Sequel, a break, he needs a hug, or - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 15:06:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14138589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nahm/pseuds/nahm
Summary: The aftermath of Marsac return leaves everyone shaken. Athos feels things falling apart and instead of being there he runs. That’s all he’s ever been good at. Running.





	My Everything

**Author's Note:**

> When I'm plagued with pain  
> And filled with fear  
> I run to you, and you alone  
> When my days are few  
> And death is near  
> I run to you, and you alone  
> 'Cause you're my light in the dark

Aramis is being sloppy. His movements are sluggish and distracted, something else is on his mind other then their sparring, Athos is almost offended, except his worry outweighs whatever distain he’s feeling. “Am I keeping you from something otherwise important?” He mutters, sending the Spanish musketeer a glare. Normally Aramis would shrug his half hearted comments off and give a witty reply, instead he looks lost. “Aramis.” 

He finally looks in his direction, there’s no trace of the charming, swooning man Athos has grown to love, in his place is a terrified, battle torn soldier, who just spent long days almost freezing to death. He hates that he wasn’t able to be there that night to help Aramis, to save him from whatever darkness is drowning him. “He’s districted,” Porthos calls, concern in his tone. “Must be to many woman warming his bed to cloud his mind.” He’s trying to keep it light, remind Aramis that he’s safe and alive. 

Whatever trance he was in is shaken from his body and a smile slips back on his face. To anyone outside their group it would appear as if everything was fine, but they know better, the smile doesn’t reach his eyes, his grip on his sword is loose and shaky. Aramis is one bad comment from snapping and the last time this happened it had been weeks before they could pull him back. Marsac came back and threw everything into chaos, tossing forgotten memories and feelings into the wind, Aramis did and said things he wouldn’t have otherwise.

Athos hates the man; despises what he reduces Aramis to. He may be able to forgive him for almost killing Treville, given the circumstances, but he would never be able to forgive how broken he’d left Aramis. In some respects it would have been better if Marsac had stayed away. “At least I have woman to warm my bed, that’s more than any of you can say.” He answers, nodding in Athos’ direction to advance. On a good day Aramis was able to keep up with Athos, mostly because he knew he’s tricks and moves, however on days like today he’s barely able to keep up with d’Artagan. 

Athos has had enough. He steps forward to meet Aramis, a scowl on his face. Their swords clash once, twice, three times before Aramis matches him, his face focused and eyes narrowed. At least it’s some sort of reaction. He has a pulse for the first time since they started training. “I didn’t think you were paying attention.” He growls, parrying to his right and striking him across the side. “Or maybe you aren’t.” 

Athos doesn’t miss the snarl Aramis sends him as he strikes again. This time he’s rushing and angry, not thinking about his openings and just attacking blindly. Athos has only seen him battle this way a handful of times, when the emotions become to much or when either Porthos or himself are in harms way and his train of thought becomes about protecting. 

He blocks about every strike, save for the one Aramis slashed against his face, it isn’t until he feels Porthos between them that he notices the blood on his cheek. “Enough! Unless you two intend to kill each other.” He holds Aramis at bay, allowing the reality to sink in. He’d actually cut him. Sliced open his skin and made him bleed. Training wounds aren’t new, it comes with the territory but Athos has never purposely gotten one from Aramis. It leaves a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach, one of mistrust and the desire to bolt out of the garrison. 

Athos fights against it, chewing on the inside of his lip as he turns away, his sword slips back around his waist, a comforting weight against his hip. “It’s fine, no damage done.” _She didn’t mean it, it was a slip of her hand, nothing more. _His relationship with Porthos and Aramis is still new, in the first few legs of development and Athos already feels like he’s fucking it up. “Calm him down and we’ll meet up afterwards.” He doesn’t turn to look at Porthos, knowing when he sees the cut on his cheek he’ll lash out and become angry.__

__Instead of Porthos stopping him like he expected it’s Aramis whose reaching out for him, his hands trembling. “Don’t go, Athos.” He begs, whimpering. This is what Milady has done to him, instead of turning to comfort the ones he loves he just wants to run. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have lashed out at you like that.” His slim arms wrap around his waist, his heart pounding against his back, in sync with his breathing. “Let me look at you, amour.”_ _

__Athos stands frozen, unsure of how to proceed. They are to exposed out here. Risking anyone finding out about the three of them just to comfort Aramis doesn’t seem worth it. “I’m fine.” He removes the other mans arms. “We’ll talk later.” He leaves Aramis and Porthos standing in the middle of the garrison, not having the heart to look back._ _

__•••_ _

__How Athos ended up in a tavern is unknown. All he remembers is walking through town, voiding the stares of the citizens. It only makes sense he ran for booze, he’s to much of a coward to deal with his emotions without the comforting burn in his veins. It’s sad really, how depend he’s become on wine. His father would be ashamed of him, spit on his name and throw him to the road like the disgraced Comte he’s become._ _

__He’s what has to be his fifth drink when the doors open, Athos ignores whomever comes through the tavern until a shadow looms over him. He half expects to see Porthos standing over him, ready to lecture him about vanishing when Aramis needed him. Instead the beautiful face of his _dead_ wife looks down at him and Athos feels his heart stop. Milady is as stunning as she’s always been, chestnut hair cascading down her shoulders and back like a waterfall, a sly lethal smile is painted on her face in a bright red. _ _

__

__

__Athos feels sick._ _

__“Athos,” Her voice is sweet like honey, a suckle of poison and seduction. “Still heavy in the bottle I see.” Her entire movement is like a well thought out beautiful dance, she’s full of grace and elegance. “Such a shame, all the potential you had.” She’s slow to pull off her gloves, laying them across be table between them. “Reduced to drinking in a dark corner in a run down tavern when you be drinking in a castle. Such a shame.” Her fingers curl around his class and she takes his drink, her memorizing emerald eyes never leaving his._ _

__“You’re supposed to be dead.” He spits out, curling his hands into a fist to stop them from shaking. Athos, himself, had made sure she’s paid for what she’s done to Thomas. A ray of moonlight comes down from the hole in the room, surrounding Milady in a shroud of flawlessness. Even death couldn’t take away the one thing she’d mastered. Milady was a king cobra and Athos was the mouse._ _

__“And you’re suppose to be Comte de la Fere, look how that ended.”_ _

__With his family home burning to ashes, everything he’d ever been gone forever. While he’d been happy to finally let go of who he’d once been, it also meant letting Thomas go and allowing himself to move on from the guilt. Both in which he hadn’t entirely been successful. “What do you want?” He mutters, knowing full well she must have wanted something, Mildly always has a plan, a master scheme Athos had been to blind to see before._ _

__Her delicate hands come toward his face, for a moment he thinks she going to touch him but she only takes the hat off his head and places atop her gloves. “No need to hide, Olivier, I’ve been more imitate with you than those musketeer ever have or will be with you.” Anger snaps against his chest when she mentions Aramis and Porthos, she already took Thomas from him he won’t allow her to take them from him as well. “Plus the world should see your beautiful sorrowful eyes.”_ _

__Athos snaps the hat from her grasp and places it back on his head, sending a glare in her direction. “You don’t get to say these things to me anymore.” He stands, only swaying a little, and turns to leave. Athos has only just started to shake her presence from his life, he won’t allow her back in to ruin everything. He can’t. “Leave Paris or I will kill you.”_ _

__“You already have, my love.” She stands to meet him, her finger tips tracing down the wound on his cheek. “Besides I have plans and in order to get what I want I need to stick around,” Milady leans in against his chest, breathing down his back as she whispers. “Watch your boys Athos, you and I both know how easily they can be taken.” She pulls away and is gone before Athos can catch his bearings._ _

__Her words follow him all the way back home, he can’t shake the feeling of dread clinging to his skin. Milady knows about his relationship with Aramis and Porthos, without meaning to he’s put them both in danger. Just like Thomas. It’s a never ending cycle, one Athos knows if he doesn’t break will surly kill him._ _

__He ends up at Aramis’s rooms without meaning to. The light is still on, telling him that they’d waited for him to come stumbling home. Athos knows what he needs to do but it’s killing him. He doesn’t want to lose whatever relationship he’d built with them, they’re the only thing keeping him going but he’s terrified what might happen if he continues to put them at risk. The steps heading to the room are to steep and by the time he’s reached the top Athos is out of breath and in the verge of tears._ _

__He can’t do this. Athos cant knowingly break their hearts._ _

__Before he can change his mind the door swings open and Porthos is standing in its threshold. A small smile is on his lips and his arms are stretched open, without thought Athos falls into them, clinging to the scent of cinnamon, musket balls, and a strong spice he can’t identify. It’s screams Porthos and home. Aramis is waiting on the bed, his head hung, his leg bobbing up and down, his eyes are red from crying and Athos feels his heart break. “Look who came home, Mis.”_ _

__His soul shatters when Aramis looks up, the Spanish musketeer looks horrible, his face is flushed and pale, his hair is messed beyond saving. He sniffles and launches to his feet, leaping toward them and before he can protest Porthos has them both embraced in his arms. “Please forgive me, Athos!” Aramis sobs between hiccups, his entire body shaking. Athos hates that he’s made his love this upset, he hates that he’s the cause of this._ _

__Lifting his hands up, Athos runs his fingers through his hair and down his back, trying to sooth whatever fear Aramis is fighting. “It’s I who should be sorry,” He mutters, the conversation with his wife completely gone from his subconscious. His main concern was making sure Aramis was alright. “I shouldn’t have pushed you when you needed me to comfort you.” He replies. “And I shouldn’t have left.” Running has always been an easy escape. Something he’s been doing for years, the only difference now is that there are two other people in the crossfire._ _

__“It’s okay, amour-“_ _

__“No, it’s not. For years I’ve been running from my past, pushing my feelings aside because I’ve been to afraid to face the past, the things I’ve done. You, both of you, deserve better. I shouldn’t have run from you when you needed me Aramis, and I won’t in the future.”_ _

__Aramis looks at him for a moment, a real smile slipping into his face. He presses his forehead against his and closes his eyes, Aramis scent of flowers, gun powder and cloves over powers him, washing away whatever worries he had. This is what safety felt like, Athos has never felt more at home than in the arms of Aramis and Porthos._ _

__“What the hell am I going to do with the two of you.” Porthos grumbles, leading them over to the bed. Athos will forever be grateful for Porthos and his way to diffuse the tension, especially when Aramis and Athos are to far gone to realize how far they’ve fallen._ _

__“Love us unconditionally.” Aramis pipes up, all but crawling into the lager mans lap. Athos fears for a moment that his affection have left him but he’s pulled into the huddle a few seconds later. “Not that you would do anything other than that anyway.”_ _

__Athos knows how deep Porthos’ love runs for them. He’s been on the receiving end of his long desires stares and deep rumbles of love for months now. Even if they no longer desired each other, Porthos would continue to love them without fault. He’s never had that before, even his own parents loved him with some sort of condition, wanted him to change to fit their mould, Milady used and corrupted him, got so deep into his system he’d been addicted to the high he’d gotten when he was with her. With Porthos it was just pure, untinted, unconditional love._ _

__Athos is filled with the sudden need to them everything, he doesn’t want to keep secrets from them anymore, it’s tearing not only him but their relationship apart. “I need to tell you something.” His voice gets lost in Aramis’ chest, his well trained fingers weaving through his hair. “It might change the way you look at me..”_ _

__Porthos’ deep laugh causes both of them to shake, Athos welcomes it with a small smile, nothing in the world sounds half a good as Porthos laughing. “We’ve seen you after your worst drinking nights, most of which would have ended with you arrested had we not saved your ass I might add, nothing you could tell us would change the way we look at you.”_ _

__“I’m married,” Athos mutters in return. “And she’s in Paris.”_ _

__“...”_ _

__The room is so unbearably quiet that Athos can feel his thoughts starting to take over, every possibly runs through his brain, this is their last straw they aren’t going to want anything to-_ _

__Aramis lifts his chin up to make him look him in the eye, there’s a smile on his lips and a kindness in his eyes that Athos is certain he’ll never deserve. “We figured there was a woman, we just didn’t know the details.” His thumb is tracing along his cheek and Athos feels himself melt with his touch, he pauses at the fresh wound on his skin and frowns. “We all have wounds, Athos, some are harder to see then others but they are still present. Whatever happened with your wife we hold no fault in you for.”_ _

__Porthos leans forehead and places a soft kiss on top of his head, effectively calming him. “We love you for all of you, Athos, your past and all.” It still amazed him how a few simple words from Aramis or a kiss from Porthos could settle his nerves, when before booze had been the only coping mechanism. “We all have a past, what’s important is how we move forward with it, Aramis and I are always going to be here for you. Regardless if your married or not.” He places a kiss on both cheeks before planting on his lips, sealing the words._ _

__“It’s not that I’m just married,” He replies, his words seeming to fail him. “I killed her..” Athos hands clench on the bed beside him, a panic starting to set in his lungs. “I came home one day and found her leaning over my kid brother, Thomas had discovered something he shouldn’t have and she killed him for it. I had been so blinded with love and desire that I wasn’t able to see what was right in front of me. I let her into my home and she murdered my brother.” His body is trembling now, the walls closing in around him. “Now she is back in Paris and knows about you two and I’m completely terrified of what she’ll do...”_ _

__Aramis squirms off Porthos’ lap so the larger musketeer is now within arms reach, he scoops Athos up and holds him against his chest, a protective aurora surrounds the three of them. “We aren’t going to let anything happen to you, Athos.” It’s not his person he’s worried about, it’s them, their lives if he gets to close. “It’s always been the three of us and nothing, not even your estranged wife, will stop it from being that.” Aramis hums in agreement and places a kiss on his forehead, causing his heart to skip a beat._ _

__“We love you, Athos, we have for a long time and that’s not going to change.”_ _

___I love you too._ _ _

__

__

__He couldn’t say the words, not without feeling like he was going to choke, instead he presses himself closer to Porthos and allows the two of them to comfort him._ _

__If only forgetting about Milady had been that easy, Athos would find in the next few weeks how tempting the poisonous scent of the king cobra really was and just how deadly her strike was._ _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to everyone whose been reading! I feel like Porthos doesn’t get that much attention so Porthos gets his turn to fall apart and be built back up, while Athos dealing with his shit of course.


End file.
